Recently, I attended a Connected Women of Influence networking event that covered one very hot topic. There were 50 women in the room and five men on the panel. These women all wanted to know the answer to this question from a male’s point of view, “What do women do that sabotages their career success?”
As you can imagine I was taking lots of notes so I could share their answers with all of you! Here’s what the men had to say:
(Warning: I do not AGREE with all of these statements but this is what the men shared so I didn’t want to leave anything out. Don’t blame me if they said something you did not like!)
Why aren’t more women in senior management?
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When women are looking for senior positions, they don’t quantify their impact as much as men do. You need to share what you did and how you did it with a dollar value or number. Your previous successes are how you are going to sell yourself for the senior level position. Push the accomplishments of everything you have done in your career. What did you do and what was the impact? Make sure people know your contributions. Don’t be modest or less competitive.
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Women often have self-limiting beliefs. They continually say, “What me?!” when getting promoted.
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Women tend to stay more in female groups. Don’t limit your relationships to only female-oriented groups. Join some networking groups with men also.
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Technical skill. Put on a technical skill hat if that’s what needs to be.
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Men are happier to delegate. Women managers can be more controlling and don’t want to give up stuff. Women need to trust more.
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Merit will get you in the door, what pushes you through the door is trust. When men compete it builds trust. When women compete with each other, they don’t build trust. Always think about how are you earning the trust of the decision maker?
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Women bring great attention to detail, but don’t forget to fall in love with the big vision and become a storyteller.
If you had a daughter, what would you advise your daughter about working in the professional world?
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You don’t have to have an overcompensating angry style as a manager just because you are a woman. You don’t have to be harder and tougher than men. You don’t need to get angry and scare the people you manage. You don’t need to put on a body of armor on and go to war.
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There is a burden on women to present things more tactfully than men have to. Fine tune your communication style but be who you are.
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Be yourself, the best leaders lead by example.
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Push when you are negotiating but you don’t need to bring a sledgehammer to the meeting.
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Find a mentor.
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Learn through other’s mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. The most important thing is how you learn from the mistakes.
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You have no boundaries and are just as capable as men are. If I had a daughter I would tell her that she could do anything. I would not close any doors or dictate what direction she should go in.
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Kill people with your love.
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Fear is false expectations appearing to be real. Don’t limit yourself.
Does having children hold women back in business?
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If you want to be a CEO, own that! You can have more than one role such as wife, mom, and CEO.
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It’s looked at but not talked about. It’s not a PC thing to discuss.
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Have kids right away and don’t space it out. Make it a shorter period of time of your life. (Note from Anna: This one did not get a good reaction from the crowd…or me!!)
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The world is changing and women’s roles are changing. You need to define what you want and why you want it. The how works out every time. If you want kids and know why you also want to be a CEO, you can do it.
